Cake Talk

Customers Behaving Badly

We've all been there.  You've had a bad day.  Maybe the stress of party planning has taken a toll.  Maybe you're getting a cold or you have a toothache.  Maybe you are just plain tired.

We understand.  Everyone has a bad day from time to time.  We work very had to be sure every one of our customers gets the cake they were expecting. Sometimes things go wrong, and when they do, we make every attempt to make it right, even if that means working late, delivering a cake that has to be re-decorated.  Or whatever it takes.

The overwhelming majority of our customers are extremely nice and polite.  And glad to be picking up a cake for a happy occasion.  We have never had to enforce the "Be Nice or Leave" signs in our shop, but we have thought about it on occasion.  For example...

A customer orders a 3-tier birthday cake in teal, brown and white.  Teal may be a slightly subjective color, but we happen to have many bottles of premixed gel colors (straight from the factory), including TEAL.  "THIS IS KELLY GREEN" she screams at us, insisting we scrape all the offending icing off the cake and start over.

A customer orders a cake with the instructions to write "Happy Birthday Mom" in either yellow or pink.  The decorator, not sure which color to use, calls the number on the order sheet to ask the customer.  The phone is answered by her mother (the subject of the cake), who happens to have the same first name, and tells us pink is her favorite color.  When the daughter comes in to pick up the cake, she informs us "YOU SHOULD GIVE ME A DISCOUNT FOR TOTALLY SPOILING MY MOTHER'S BIRTHDAY SURPRISE."

A mother planning her child's first birthday party gives us an invitation to use as a guide to decorating the cake.  On it are at least twelve animals in a Noah's ark themed design.  We copy three of them on the cake.  One of my employees delivered the cake.  While her husband looked on helplessly, she screamed  "IS THIS THE UGLIEST CAKE YOU HAVE EVEN SEEN?? WHERE IS THE TURTLE?? HER FAVORITE ANIMAL IS THE TURTLE??" He brought it back to the shop, we added a turtle, and everyone was happy.

A 3-dimensional cake does not have the exact design the customer wants so we proceed to take the cake apart to fix it.  As we are putting the cake back together, it no longer stands up straight all by itself.  The customer walks out of the shop, irate that she has to witness a work in progress.  A few minutes later, the phone rings. I AM SO ANGRY THAT I AM GOING TO DRIVE AROUND FOR A HALF HOUR.  IF I AM ABLE TO CALM DOWN, I WILL BE BACK TO GET THE CAKE, OTHERWISE I WANT MY MONEY BACK.  The cake is fixed five minutes later but she never comes back.

A 21-year-old goes off the wall because the "turquoise" dots on her cake were not the color turquoise she was expecting.  While she rants, the phone rings.  It's her mother, who has stepped outside, apologizing for her daughter's inexcusable behavior.  "SHE HAS HAD A BAD DAY."

The mother of a 10-year-old comes in, on the way to the party, to pick up a square stacked cake that looks like a package. Her face says it all, but she still screams "THE BOW IS NOT BIG ENOUGH.  I SAW A CAKE HERE WHEN I ORDERED THIS ONE THAT HAD A MUCH BIGGER BOW."

Days, months, and years later, we still talk about these customers and sigh...

Zebra Prints

We go through design phases at the bakery. Right now, zebra prints are IN!  Here are just two examples, but we've done this design so much lately that I am considering buying black fondant, already mixed.

The design works for "boy" cakes as well as "girl" cakes.  For kids and adults.  And it goes well with just about any bright color, but especially hot pink, lime green, yellow and red.

We've even done brown stripes on white, and teal on chocolate, although those were not my favorite color combinations.

The cookies-as-decoration also work well, even though the palm trees are a bit fragile.  We have often converted the palm "tree" to a palm "bush" when the trunk broke at the neck.

Just remember, this is cake (or cookies) and not a permanent work of art.

Laptop Cake

Happy Birthday Matthew!  You are turning 30 and your wife thought, as you are a computer programmer, you might enjoy a new laptop for your birthday.  And, since you probably already have a real one (or two or three), how about one made entirely of cake and rice crispy treats?

The flip top is made of rice crispy treats and covered in fondant.  The keys are also fondant.  The main "cake" is chocolate, with peanut butter buttercream.

And all those 0's and 1's at the bottom.  I've been told they spell out "Happy Birthday" in binary code.

Halloween Fun in the Bakery

Can you make a haunted house cake?

What a question.  Sure we can.  Especially if you give us carte blanche in the decorating arena.  This customer, one of our "regulars" did exactly that, saying "just do whatever you want."

I love that kind of freedom.

So we had fun today.

We started with a 10-inch square chocolate cake. Plus a few extra "scraps" from previous recent cake carving episodes. Plus a half-sheet cake board.

Then we added fondant windows and shutters and a door... more fondant "bricks" for the chimneys...glitter gel for the spider webs...luster dust to make the moon silver...orange candy melts for the cobble stones...fondant stars and bats...chocolate tombstones...cookie ghosts...and lots and lots of buttercream.

It was almost  a shame to sell it.

Good Cake Day

We had several nice cakes today, but these two are our favorites.

It's Halloween on Saturday, so a witch's hat is entirely on point.  The brim is a 14-inch round cake.  The top of the hat is a two-layer 6-inch round cake, topped with several inches of formed rice crispy treats.

The entire cake is covered in buttercream and topped with black ganache.  Then we sprinkled on lots of edible glitter before stacking the two parts.  Several skewers will keep the parts stacked straight for travel.

The little mice are made from fondant, and the spiderwebs are spun sugar.  We got to play with lots of fun stuff for this cake!!

The soccer ball cake is for one of the ladies on the University of Alabama soccer team.

The base is a simple chocolate cake and the soccer ball is molded from rice crispy treats (our new "favorite" molding medium).  The ball is covered with white fondant and black fondant pentagons were placed to finish the decoration. The bow is fondant; the stars are gum paste.

I must admit a soccer ball is not nearly as easy to make as a football, basketball, volleyball, golf ball, or just about any other kind of sport ball.

But we had fun and we get to do it again tomorrow.

Now THAT'S art!

We got a call several weeks ago asking if we could do a special cake for the 50th Anniversary of Indian Hills Country Club inTuscaloosa.

This is what they sent us.

Sure...(or kinda sure...), it looked do-able.  I've been to Indian Hills many, many time to deliver wedding cakes, but never really paid that much attention to what the outside of the building really looked like.

Now however, Kristi and I are intimately familiar with the detailed architecture of the facade.  We tried to capture the basic elements on two large sheet cakes, that were displayed side-by-side.  Everything -- from the bricks to the windows, shutters, roofing shingles and shadows, to the large trees and even the parking spaces -- was drawn by hand, first with a toothpick, then followed with chocolate, green and gray buttercream icing in pastry bags fitted with #1 tips.

It took the two of us the better part of a day to finish it up.  As I pulled up to the building with the cakes in the car, I paid a whole lot more attention to where I was and smiled.

The Secret to Creme Brulee

First, repeat after me.

"This is a torch and THIS is a lighter..."

"This is a torch and THIS is a lighter..."

"This is a torch and THIS is a lighter..."

Now...the secret to creme brulee is cold "creme" and hot "brulee."  The creme part of this delicious dessert is a custard made from egg yolks, sugar and cream.  You cook it slowly so that it does not curdle or separate.  Then you have to chill it.  Preferably overnight.  Then, just before serving, you top it with sugar and torch the top to caramelize the sugar.  A perfect creme brulee goes to the table hot on the top from the torch, but cold underneath.

A very good friend of ours, who happens to be a caterer, had a party the other night for 60 guests.  The dessert was creme brulee.

Realizing, the day of the event, that he could not find his torch, he asked if we had one he could borrow. We had borrowed a bunch of supplies from them the week before, including some portable butane burners, and they were coming over anyway to pick them up.   I found our torch and put it aside for them.  It was blue, very much like the one in the photo, only a bit smaller.

That afternoon, we were both busy.  I was out of the shop running an errand, and he was prepping for dinner.  He sent one of his servers to pick up his supplies and the torch. One of my employees helped load the truck.

Long story made short, the serve took a "blue" lighter instead of the blue torch.

When I returned from my errands, I noticed the torch was still on the counter and called the caterer.  Voice mail.  Left a message that I would be happy to drop it off if they called and let me know where the event was.  Never got a call back.

When the server returned, the caterer asked if he had the blue torch.  The server said yes. And that was that.  Until it was time to torch the cremes for dessert.  He asked for the torch and was handed the lighter.

I won't repeat what happened next.

"This is a torch and THIS is a lighter..."

Even if the lighter is blue.

Recipe for Creme Brulee

2 cups heavy cream

5 large egg yolks

1/2 cup sugar

1 vanilla bean

1. Using a wire whisk or an electric mixer fitted with the whip attachment, vigorously whisk egg yolks with granulated sugar in a large bowl, until mixture becomes light in color and sugar has dissolved a bit; set aside.
2. In a medium-sized saucepan, combine heavy cream with vanilla beans which have been carefully split down the center, its fragrant black seeds scraped from the pod, and both combined with the cream. Bring the mixture to a simmer; when small bubbles have formed around the edges of the cream it is ready.
3. Gradually pour the cream mixture into the egg/sugar mix, whisking gently by hand to combine. Strain custard through a fine mesh strainer, retrieve vanilla bean and place it back into the custard. Chill and cover mixture with a sheet of plastic wrap, pierced several times to release any steam (chilling mixture overnight will let the flavors develop and allow custard to thicken a bit).
4. Preheat oven to 350*F (180*C). Place individual ramekins in a baking pan, large enough to hold 4 to 5 six-ounce custard cups and deep enough to allow the water for the bain-marie to be added reaching at least halfway up the sides of the dishes.
5. Remove the vanilla bean from the custard mixture (can be reserved for another use) and fill ramekins 3/4 full. Place pan in preheated oven and pour hot water into baking pan so water level reaches halfway up the sides of the ramekins. Cover pan with a sheet of heavy-duty aluminum foil, sealing edges to retain steam. Cook 40 to 50 minutes or until custards are set. To test for doneness, gently shake the individual ramekins; if center is still a bit liquid-like or wobbly return custards to oven and continue to cook, checking every 5 to 7 minutes, until it has just set, with a small area in the center, the size of a quarter, still a bit loose.
6. Remove ramekins from baking pan and chill custard in refrigerator several hours or until chilled through.
7. To serve put a thin layer of granulated sugar atop each custard. Using a blow torch, over a heat and flame proof surface (like over a large cookie or baking sheet) caramelize sugar working from the outside in towards the middle keeping the torch in constant motion. Sugar should be golden brown and caramelized never black. If burnt, let the sugar layer cool a few minutes than peel it away with a paring knife and begin again.
8. Serve immediately.

Basketball and Sneakers

Now THIS is the kind of cake we love to make.  Definitely not run of the mill, it was a bit of a challenge, but not overly stressful.

Plus, since our kitchen and decorating area are totally open, it is also the kind of cake we like customers to see us decorating.

We did this one for a groom's cake on the Saturday of the Kentuck Festival.  It is all chocolate cake, except for the bottom third of the basketball, which is made from rice crispy treats (they provide better structural support than cake).

All of the cakes are covered in buttercream icing, with fondant accents for the basketball seams, white trim and laces on the shoes. The green buttercream "grass" hides the cake boards.

Ouch!

Our role as a concessions vendor at the Kentuck festival this past weekend was an absolute disaster for us.

But it was not the thousands of dollars of unsold baked goods (we can freeze some of them).

And it was not the wet grounds (the Tuscaloosa News called it a "mudfest"). The mud was not really that bad, especially if you wore boots. OUR car did not even get stuck.

Nor was it the cold (technically great bakery weather). The weather was crisp and cool, but not freeezing.

It was not even the cost of the tent and permit and sneeze guard and tarps. Or the banner or the cash box or the long extension cords and various other supplies we had to buy for the event and are unlikely to ever use again. Or the packaging that we'll have for the next ten years.

And it was not the hundreds of dollars of pastries we donated to the patron's pavilion. After all, that was technically a "trade-out" for the value of the concession space. I am overlooking the little snafu with the "borrowed" butane and the "Gate Nazi" (which are two whole other stories).

No, what really hurts is my back. And my legs. And my poor tired feet from carting all that "stuff" from the parking lot into the park and out to our tent. And carting all the food we had expected to sell. And then carting it all back to the car on Sunday evening when the festival closed. My choices were to pay my employees to sit in the car for hours waiting "our turn" to enter the grounds and unload, or sherpa the items from the parking lot into the festival.

Then there are the huge black and blue marks I got from dropping one of the tables on my leg.

I don't blame anybody for the financial catastrophe. I gambled on the festival and lost. And I won't be doing that again.

And I certainly can't blame anyone for the physical aches and pains. If you do festivals and catering for a living, you find less painful ways of setting up and breaking down.

Next year we will stick to our knitting and sell from the shop. Leave the festival to the seasoned and professional festival food providers of corn dogs and funnel cakes and curly fries.

So, in the future, if you want fresh croissants, muffins, cookies, and hot chocolate made from ganache (instead of "Swiss Miss"), or banana bread or pumpkin bread, or chicken salad or pimiento cheese, or real spiced hot cider, or Alabama Blues Blend coffee, you'll have to stop by the bakery on your way in or out of the festival. Because you won't find us on-site.

Antiques Roadshow

Happy Birthday Wendell Garrett.

The appraiser, of Antiques Roadshow fame, is celebrating his 80th birthday in Tuscaloosa today with cake from Mary's.

Three cakes -- strawberry, chocolate and white -- covered in marble fondant and luster dust, resemble old books.

We had the funnest time making them and hope he enjoys his birthday.  Wonder what kind of appraisal they will get...