Cake Talk

1 in 300,000

A customer came in the other day around noon time and bought a dozen decorated shortbread cookies. Cute little footballs with white trim and a red "A."

Mid-afternoon, the phone rings.

Customer: I just bought some shortbread cookies at your shop.

Me: Yes m'am, I remember you were here about noon time.  How may I help you?

Customer: They were the worst cookies I have ever eaten.  And I bought them for friends -- who had to throw them out, I was so embarrassed.

Me (as I reach into the case, take one out and pop it into my mouth): I'm so sorry, but I am eating one right now and it tastes fine, what was the problem?

Customer: Well you must have left out one of the ingredients, like maybe the sugar.

Me (there are only three ingredients in this cookie -- margarine, sugar and flour -- so it would be pretty hard to leave one of them out, and they are coated with a sugar glaze): I am so sorry but they taste to me like they always do. But perhaps our shortbread cookies are not for you.  I would be more than happy to replace them with something else.

Customer: I'm in Selma (about 100 miles away), I can hardly bring them back.

Me: We'll leave a gift card for you at the register.  You can use it to try something different.

Customer: I didn't want anything, I just wanted you to know how terrible they were.

Me: Thank you for bringing it to my attention.

After she hung up, I checked the reports on our point of sales system.  Since the bakery opened in July 2006, we have sold over 300,000 decorated shortbread cookies. And that is not counting the cookies that end up on platters or gift tins (and are not sold as individual cookies), the cookies we give away to children, and the cookies we donate to various organizations.

I think 1-in-300,000 is pretty darn good.

But what I really meant was...

People see our bakery and have all sorts of interesting expectations.  And, when you work in retail, you are taught that the customer is always right. So I try to be as agreeable as possible when dealing with customers. And I almost always mean what I say. Except when what I really meant was something entirely different.  Here are a few examples...

Customer:  Can you do this three tier cake to serve 50 people by this afternoon?
Me: No, I am so sorry but we are already totally booked for the next couple of days.
BWIRMW: You must be kidding...did you think we could just whip up and bake three cakes, let them cool, then ice, decorate and stack them in just two hours?

Customer: Will you bake my wedding cake the morning of the wedding?
Me: Your cake will be as fresh as possible.
BWIRMW: And your wedding is at 11am?  Do you have any idea how long it takes to bake, cool, ice, decorate and stack a wedding cake?

Customer: Where is your fresh bread? I really love your fresh bread.
Me: We're baking fresh bread on Thursdays now.
BWIRMW: We stopped baking bread daily almost two years ago, so I guess it's been a while since you bought any of that bread you really love.

Customer:  I am having an employee meeting tomorrow, could you donate some cookies?
Me: If you are having a fund raiser for charity, we would be happy to donate a gift card, but we do not donate our food products.
BWIRMW: Wow, I never even thought of asking a business to DONATE something to give to my employees.

Customer:  I have a recipe for my grandmother's pound cake, can you make me one for tomorrow?
Me: No, but could I recommend a personal chef or caterer?
BWIRMW: Hmmm, let me see... tie up our mixers, ovens and employees for one pound cake? Yeah, right.

Just smile and wave, boys, smile and wave.

A Star is Born: Miss Lucy Monroe

Overcoming a troubled past and a broken home, she rose to become a star in her own right.  Her full name?  Miss Lucy Monroe, Carrot Cake Blondie.  And you can take her home for just $1.25.

A troubled past... It all started because carrot cake is the insiders' choice at the bakery.  Tuesday was Kristi's birthday, Wednesday was Ben's birthday, and they both wanted carrot cake (we always celebrate birthdays at the bakery with cake!).

Well, Mary over-filled the pans and they dripped over the sides in the oven, filling the bakery with that "burnt batter" smell.  And there was absolutely nothing I could do since moving them while still in that fragile, unbaked state would damage them beyond repair.  So we endured and took them out when they were done, opening the doors to release that smell.  Except for the pans, which were totally coated with baked-on carrot cake on the outside (and the smell), the finished cakes looked perfect!

Overcoming a broken home...Then one of the nine-inch rounds crumbled as Emily was icing it. Way too fresh (make mental note to freeze carrot cakes first).  #@&%$!!  No worries, just dump those pieces into a half-sheet pan, cover them with blondie batter, and bake.  And resist the urge to just eat the crumbs.  As it rose nicely in the oven, the bakery was now filled with that familiar cinnamon and carrot and blondie smell.  Now we have a blondie with chunks of carrot cake.  Can't cover it with cream cheese icing because it would then have to be refrigerated, so we topped it with buttercream and pecans.  YUM!!!

A star is born...Now what to call our new baby?  We're on Facebook with about 200 fans, many of whom interact frequently.  So we made it into a contest.  A $10 credit at the bakery to the fan with the best suggestion for a name.  We got lots of responses, in the order received...

• Carrot Crumble Blondie
• Lucy Monroe
• Carrot-Blondie Delight
• Carrot Cake Blondie
• Bleached Red-Head
• Blonde Rabbit
• Carrot Top Blondie
• Blonde Bunny
• Sassy Blonde Carrot Cake
• Carrot Cake Remix
• Twice-Baked Carrot Cake
• Bugs Bunny's Blondie
• Car-Blon Ambition
• Carrot-Butter Yum

And the winner is... They were all great suggestions, but I liked the "Lucy Monroe" the best.  It's a name, for carrot-top Lucille Ball, and blonde Marilyn Monroe. But it needs a description, so the full name for the new baby is "Miss Lucy Monroe, Carrot Cake Blondie," after all we ARE in the South.

Thanks everyone, and we'll happily give out prizes to the two winners.  And a third (for honorable mention) to the first to suggest "Bleached Red Head."

Become a fan of Mary's Cakes & Pastries on Facebook for more fun opportunities.

Our display case...

We're a retail bakery.  That means we have display cases to fill with fresh goodies every day.  So here are some we made for today.  First there are the papaya and pineapple scones...

Then there are the bear claws...

And the pain-au-chocolats...

And the thumbprint cookies filled with ganache...

And the ginger snaps (by brother's favorites)...

And some of the shortbread cookies (Roll Tide!!)...

And I'll end the post with fresh lemon squares...

Shortbread Cookies from Mary's: The Perfect Tailgate Dessert

21 days to kickoff and we're already making Alabama themed shortbread cookies by the tens of dozens.  Why?  Because they are the perfect tailgate dessert.

1. They don't mind the hot weather and won't melt or spoil.
2. They just scream BAMA FAN!
3. You can hold a cookie in one hand and a drink in the other.
4. They go with just about everything.
5. They come in a recyclable crimson and white box.
6. They are 100% natural (except maybe for the red food coloring).
7. You can get them on Friday and they're still good Saturday.
8. They are made and decorated just a few miles from the University so buying them supports the local economy!
9. Guys like 'em, sorority girls like 'em, even Nick Saban likes 'em!
10. They went to the Sugar Bowl!

One fish, two fish, red fish, blue fish

Can you do a Dr. Seuss cake?  For a two-year old?

Sure, but cookies are so much cuter. And easier for small children to eat without making a big mess.  Besides, there is no fighting over who has more icing, or who gets the decoration.

Here's our homage to Horton Hears a Who, The Cat in the Hat, and One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish.

I think the kids will love 'em. We sure did.

Easter Treats and A-Day

No, we don't make lamb cakes, or bunny cakes or even Easter egg  cakes.  You can get these at Publix.  There is a pretty good chance however that the cake you get will not look exactly like the one in the photo.  That's why there are blogs like Cake Wrecks.

We have nice easter cookies.  And carrot cake, cheesecake, coconut cake, and cupcakes. All made fresh, in small batches from quality ingredients, right here in our shop.  And while we may not have professional photos like they do at the supermarket, these goodies are beautifully decorated.  We'll even have hot cross buns on Saturday.

Then we'll change gears and make football and Alabama themed cookies and treats.  Cause NEXT Saturday is A-Day, when tens of thousands of Alabama football fans show up to watch the last scrimmage of spring practice.  Even ESPN will be there.

Roll Tide! And tailgate with cookies from Mary's.

 

Cookies-On-A-Stick

Six-year-olds. Cookies. Sticks. How can you go wrong?  In fact, we like them so much we're thinking of making them regulars in the bakery.

They go with this cake. The cake matches the invitations to the child's birthday party (which is pretty common in the cake decorating business).

It's the matching cookies that are the kicker.  They will be party favors for the children to take home.

Just be careful or you'll poke your eye out (a play on a famous movie quote -- extra credit if you know the name of the movie...)

The Blue Angels are coming to town

Just when you think Northport is too small to be noticed...the Blue Angels are coming to town next weekend on April 4-5.

Actually, they are coming to Tuscaloosa, since the city annexed the plot of land the airport sits on, but you have to go through Northport to get there -- you'll even pass right by our bakery.  And this little airport (officially Tuscaloosa Regional Airport), which has no commercial flights, is hosting one of  THE most famous air shows in THE COUNTRY.  They even paved the runway, just for this event!  OK, it was already paved, so they re-paved it.

The event is free to the public, but special seating is available. Grand Stand Seating (bleachers) is $10 per day;  Reserved Seating (assigned seats at the front of the crowd line) is $20 per day; Chalet Seating (tent, table and chairs plus box meal) is $50 per day.

Our advice?  Bring a lawn chair and spend the money you would have forked out on seats for some airplane cookies from Mary's on your way to the show.

Or have a Blue Angels party and get a really big cake in the shape of an airplane like this one we did for a groom's cake last week. 

See you there!

From the Mouths of Babes

We give cookies to children.  We like to keep them happy.  We like to keep the moms and dads happy.  We want them all to remember Mary's as a fun place.  They get to pick one from the case, which is a fun experience.

And we don't want children to sulk or scream or whine or pout or otherwise disrupt the bakery while they are here.  Putting a cookie in their hand is usually a good start in this direction.

Two-year-olds are not usually picky (although there is the occasional spoiled child, or the child just up from a nap -- or overtired and overdue).  But, you can often pick any cookie from the display case and hand it to them to produce an instant smile.

First-timers and exceptionally shy children are also easy to please.  Their eyes say they want a cookie but their lips are shut tight.  With the gift of a cookie, we often become instant friends for life.

Older children in Alabama have often been taught to be extremely polite with adults.  We never know if they are happy but they are quick with the "yes m'am" and "thank you m'am."

It's the middle aged children that are the hardest to please.  The 3-, 4- and 5-year olds.  They are very independent and exceptionally honest.  We have one young boy who comes in several days per week with his mother.  He likes picking out a decorated shortbread cookie.  Unfortunately, lately, the selection has been slim.  Mostly shamrocks.  And, as a frequent visitor, he's probably bored with them.

Yesterday was the worst day in a few weeks in terms of decorated cookies.  It was St. Patrick's Day and we were out of shamrocks, and had not finished decorating the new batch of Easter and Spring cookies.  I offered him a glazed (but not decorated) cookie, but he refused, eventually settling for a snickerdoodle (which in his opinion  did not have enough sprinkles...)

He came in today and I was able to offer him a selection of decorated bumble bees, butterflies, bunnies, ducks, sheep and flowers.

Big smile.  "THESE are the ones I like" he said, "the DECORATED ones."

And, all is well with the world.